Saturday Ramblings: Oct. 4, 2014 (I Wish We’d All Been Ready)

Posted byChaplainmikePosted inSaturday Ramblings

nicolas-cage

Life was filled with guns and war. And all of us got trampled on the floor. I wish we’d all been ready.

Forgetting that my wife was on a trip with her sister to Arizona this week, I woke up and saw that I was alone in the bed. I wish we’d all been ready.

I drove up to a patient’s house to make a visit this week. I stood at the front door and rang the bell. And rang the bell again. And rang the bell again. I wish we’d all been ready.

The Chicago Bears didn’t show up at Soldier Field on Sunday when the Green Bay Packers came to town. I wish we’d all been ready.

Are you ready?

Let’s ramble.

044grey-alien-101 According to David Weintraub, of Vanderbilt University, who surveyed 24 different religions on what their beliefs are regarding aliens in outer space,  55% of Atheists believe in aliens, 44% of Muslims believe, 37% of Jewish people believe (also somewhat shocking, you’d think that number would be higher), 36% of Hindus, and some 32% of Christians reportedly believe in life out there. According to the article:

Weintrab explains that Asian religions are most susceptible to believing in extraterrestrials, because in Hinduism, humans and aliens can reincarnate into one another’s worlds.

Buddism also discusses the notion of other planets being populated by alien lifeforms.

Weintraub notes that, as for Muslims, there are certain passages in the Koran that refer to the prospect of spiritual beings. As for Jews, while some rabbis do argue that the universe is infinite, there isn’t much text referring to life out there beyond our planet.

Regarding Roman Catholics, extraterrestrial lifeforms are more taboo, as creatures not descended from Adam and Eve would be subjected to ‘original sin’.

 I have no idea what to say to this. I’m not ready to process this information. I wish I had been.

044Thank God! We have finally found one of the primary reasons the church is turning off manly Esau-men and attracting only the sissy Jacob-types. The culprit is K-Love (or in this case, The Fish – a Christian radio station)! David Murrow at the Church for Men blog says Christian radio poisons boy’s faith. Here’s the claim:

5-Ways-Keep-Your-Child-Car-Seat-BoosterLittle Bobby grows up strapped into a car seat in the back of his mother’s 2004 Dodge Caravan. Over the years he listens to many hours of The Fish. And thousands of times he hears the words Safe for the Whole Family juxtaposed with songs about Jesus.

The radio station is saying that its music and talk are safe for the whole family – as they should be. However, little Bobby doesn’t make this distinction. Thanks to these constant radio reminders, Bobby comes to associate Jesus with safety. Christianity is something akin to his car seat – a boring, pedestrian device that protects little ones from harm.

When Bobby becomes a teenager, he begins to crave adventure. Danger. Risk. He listens to songs that glorify drugs, sex and risk taking. He plays blood-soaked video games that place him in the center of a dangerous adventure. He drives too fast, smokes too much and wears his pants down around his knees.

At the same time, Bobby begins to lose his faith. He feels embarrassed to say he is a Christian. It just feels wimpy and unexciting to believe in Jesus. He starts to skip youth group. Then church. He has absolutely zero interest in Christianity because it’s a safe path.

Rumor has it that is why Matthew B. Redmond ONLY plays Black Rebel Motorcycle Club when his kids are in the car.

In the same vein guys, for when you need it this weekend, The Art of Manliness has published an illustrated guide on How to Gird Up Your Loins.

If you learn how to do that, you’ll be ready for anything.

04403UP-BERNANKE-articleLargeI definitely was not ready for this. You will never guess who wasn’t able to refinance his mortgage recently. That would be Ben Bernanke, who was until earlier this year the chairman of the Federal Reserve. According to Neil Irwin of the NY Times, it was Bernanke’s job change that made him ineligible.

The problem probably boils down to this: Anybody who knows how the world works may know that Ben Bernanke has vast earning potential, and that he is as safe a credit risk as one could imagine. But he just changed jobs a few months ago. And in the thoroughly automated world of mortgage finance, having recently changed jobs makes you a steeper credit risk.

So, some computer determines that a guy who makes $250,000 per speech and has signed a book contract reported to be in the seven-figure range, who owns a house worth over $800,000, is deemed a credit risk?

Blessed are the poor.

04411994-worship_blurry.630w.tnTodd Pruitt thinks many churches are actually promoting pagan experience rather than genuine Christian worship:

There is a great misunderstanding in churches of the purpose of music in Christian worship. Churches routinely advertise their “life-changing” or “dynamic” worship that will “bring you closer to God” or “change your life.” Certain worship CD’s promise that the music will “enable you to enter the presence of God.” Even a flyer for a recent conference for worship leaders boasted:

“Join us for dynamic teaching to set you on the right path, and inspiring worship where you can meet God and receive the energy and love you need to be a mover and shaker in today’s world…Alongside our teaching program are worship events which put you in touch with the power and love of God.”

The problem with the flyer and with many church ads is that these kinds of promises reveal a significant theological error. Music is viewed as a means to facilitate an encounter with God; it will move us closer to God. In this schema, music becomes a means of mediation between God and man. But this idea is closer to ecstatic pagan practices than to Christian worship.

What do you think? Has worship music become the evangelical sacrament?

I’m not sure evangelicalism is ready to face this. Are you?

044Really. I wish we’d all been ready.

It’s finally here in all its, uh, glory, and I simply would not be Chaplain Mike nor would this be Saturday Ramblings if I did not subject you to the trailer for Left Behind.

Critics are raving: “We tried to give the film zero stars, but our tech system won’t allow it.” (Jackson Cuidon, CT)

You’ve been warned.

219 thoughts on “Saturday Ramblings: Oct. 4, 2014 (I Wish We’d All Been Ready)”

  1. Graduated from H.S. with one of their DJs, who I think is still at the station, but I would have to check on that. I have heard The Current a few times, but forgot about it last time I was in MSP.

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  4. Best Left behind reboot review quote I heard, over at Slacktivist:

    “All that’s missing is Lloyd Bridges in the control tower going ‘Looks like I picked the wrong week to start sniffing glue.'”

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  5. Very late to this discussion, but a little while ago, one of the rocknroll stations in Connecticut I grew up listening to went from that format to K-love at 5:00 on a Friday afternoon. It’s like watching WKRP backwards.

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  6. Critics are raving: “We tried to give the film zero stars, but our tech system won’t allow it.” (Jackson Cuidon, CT)

    You’ve been warned.

    After following Slacktivist’s page-by-page critique and reading a LOT of MLP:FIM fanfic in the years since, all I can say about Left Behind is it DOES make sense when you realize just WHAT it really is:

    BAD Book of Revelation fanfic centering entirely around two idealized Author Self-Inserts (AKA “Gary Stus” or “Mr Selfies”). With heavy reliance on “As you know…” idiot conversations over the phone.

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  7. I read somewhere, maybe it was even here – I don’t remember – but this quote has stuck in my mind even though I have forgotten its source:

    “The Catholics have an observatory while the Protestants have the Creation Museum.”

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  12. Still live in Minneapolis. Cities 97 has gone downhill, I’m friends with one of their former DJs and he jumped ship to actually do something decent. If you are in town, 89.3 The Current is the best thing we’ve got currently, but it’s a little light on the more harder rock sound.

    Heck, The Current is the best radio station in the country, period. Well worth listening to a steam online.

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  16. Found the reference. Tag line of a “Ted Lewis” AKA “Mr Entertainment”, novelty big-band leader from the Roaring Twenties up through WW2. Big-name Celebrity of his day, whose tag line needed no explanation — “Everybody Knows That!”

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  17. But its ratings are strong, and it is a business. So your frustration may be with those who are listening to it.

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  18. More like “Copies” in the sense of Consolation/Booby Prizes for those who are Forbidden the real thing. Kind of like near-beer (sometimes called “Mormon Beer”). Or Ersatz if you’re up on WW2 history.

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  19. Country music, on the other hand, is the godly creation of hillbillies, cowboys, and other God-fearing types (who borrowed from Irish folk songs and such). If likker and wimmin are celebrated, this should really be considered an expression of local patriotism, and thus a virtue. (“We don’t smoke marihuana in Muskogee,” nosiree, and we ain’t no homos neither.) “So barmaid, fetch a pitcher…”

    That explains the Duck Dynasty dust-up.
    “RALLY ROUND THE BEARD, BOYS!”

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  20. I up the emotional impact with another N-word instead of “race”. Because that’s what “Negro music” originally meant.

    And before Rap, there was Rock. Before Rock there was Jazz. Before Jazz there was Ragtime. All of which started out with the stigma of “N—-r Music” before white people started doing them and made them respectable. (Regarding Rock, it was Elvis — described at the time as “That White Boy with Black Moves.”)

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  21. And if you play their records backwards, you quit drinking, your ex-wife comes back to you, your wrecked truck comes back from the Pick-a-Part in mint condition, and your dead dog and dead mother come back to life.

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  22. “IS EVERYBODY HAPPY????”
    — some Thirties Celebrity tag line you hear in real old Warner Bros cartoons

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  23. The sword is a “Kopesh”, a Bronze Age sickle-sword used in Egypt and the Middle East. It’s period for the OT in both time and place.

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  24. Becky(TM) is just the Christianese version of the “Bored Housewife Soccer Mom” that’s the target demographic of Harlequin Romances, Twilight, and 50 Shades of Grey.

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  26. But the guy still sounds like he’s ready to paint his face blue and slip into “William Wallace II” mode.

    We already have a type example up in Seattle of what happens when you take that route.

    Thing is, “Church for Men” makes a lot of good points, but as entropy sets in over time, you have to go more and more to justify yourself and scream louder and louder until you’re round-the-bend RAWR!

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  27. There were a LOT of WEIRD Masses floating around “in the Spirit of Vatican II” days.

    Burgess Shale period of wild experimentation that took years to shake down.

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  28. The ecstatic (or more often, the wannabe-ecstatic) facial expressions of the worshipers. (Especially the females. At the risk of being ruled uncouth, let me share with you an observation one lady made to me about another lady she saw at one of these praise & worship gatherings: “I had a tough time figuring out if she was worshiping or working out with ben-wa balls.”)

    Wasn’t Ecstasy-to-Orgasm the big draw of Fertility Cults (and other sex-worshipping cults)?

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  29. My dentist plays Christian radio in his office. Yeah, it really is that wierd to have someone scraping the plaque off your teeth while you listen to some wispy songstress croon about wanting to be in the arms of Jesus all night long.

    Take Bella gasping over EDWARD (sparkle sparkle) and just substitute “JEESUS” (spelled with two Es) for “EDWARD” (sparkle sparkle).

    And know for One Step Beyond: Listening to some GUY croon (with halting breath and trembling lips) about wanting to be in the arms of Jesus all night long, forever. (Someone said that Jesus-is-my-Boyfriend CCM is really popular in the gay community because “where else can you a hear a man singing in orgasm over another man?”)

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  30. When oncologists talk about “pain management” and “remaining quality of life” (i.e. “keep the patient comfortable”), what’s the usual context?

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  32. Next Sunday will be the one yr anniversary of seeing them live. It was a profound moment. Beyond music. Beyond emotion. Beyond experience. It seemed as though a recognition of the human predicament. The human condition.

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  35. This was supposed to be in reply to a post which seems not to be there anymore (it asked why rock was considered bad, but country good, despite not being much more elevated), leaving me wondering whether I’ve gone insane.

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  38. I also made it through the first four. Through their mediocrity, the Left Behind novels saved me from thinking that I had to consume exclusively Christian(tm) entertainment to be considered a Christian.

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  40. Miguel, I know the NeoCal circles I’ve been in use “sacraments” and “ordinances” interchangeably, and they make a point of saying the words are equivalent.

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  41. “Becky” is familiar to me through the esteemed Atlanta journalist Warren Cole Smith in his “A Lover’s Quarrel with the Evangelical Church.” Is this where you encountered the term?

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  42. In 2010 (shortly after you moved to our fair state), I did a little (painful) research on the playlists for the local Atlanta Fish station. In over 35 hours of listening (~350 songs), I found that fully 1 out of 3 songs consisted of either (1) Chris Tomlin, (2) Casting Crowns, (3) Third Day, or (4) Mercy Me.

    I’m not kidding: 4 artists/groups sucked up 33% of the airtime! Regardless of the quality of the music, the sheer narrowness of the repertoire was quite stunning.

    On the other hand, a Breaking Bad-induced visit to Albuquerque a couple years ago revealed their own quirky Static Radio, which doesn’t stick to a purely CCM format. I swear I heard more interesting music between the VLA satellite dish array west of Socorro back to ABQ than I’ve ever heard on any station in Atlanta. It’s not everybody’s cup of tea, but check it out on-line sometime. (Ye have Google and its profits; hear them.)

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  43. I THINK that KTCZ had some form of format change recently, didn’t sound like the old Cities97 I used to know. Correct me if I am wrong, maybe they didn’t change it. I only listen to them periodically when I go back to MN. Yes, I think they played “Flood” from Jars’ first album way back.

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  44. Cities 97 (KTCZ) is an Adult Album Alternative station – always had been since it’s inception back in ’84/’85. I can see them playing Bruce Cockburn, but Jars of Clay?

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  46. “David Murrow at the Church for Men blog says Christian radio poisons boy’s faith”

    I certainly don’t think you can make a direct connection between the two, but I do think that, given how syrupy and milktoast most Christian Radio stations songs are, I think there is a kernel of truth there. Beside, it is well known (or should be) that Christian radio stations pander to a model listener named “Becky”.

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  47. Sucked referring to Cities97, not Minnesota (unless you speak of October, November, December, January, February, March, and April), or Jars of Clay or Burlap to Cashmere.

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  49. I moved from Minnesota to Georgia in Oct 2009 and while listening to one of the local “family friendly” Christian radio stations (as opposed to family unfriendly Christian radio stations…), sometime in 2009, there was a spot on one of these radio debacles that said something to the effect of “and your kids will NEVER have to hear anything that you will have to explain” – with the word “never” being spoken out like you were talking to a 1-year old (human or dog).

    Forbid it that we should ever have to talk to our kids about something controversial #inept parenting.

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  50. Hurt So Good (John Mellencamp)

    Only if you’re the dentist from Little Shop of Horrors.

    And speaking of which…
    Be a Dentist (Steve Martin)

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  51. Are you sure you were listening to a Christian radio station? I know up in Minnesota, before they sucked, Cities 97 played Jars of Clay and Burlap to Cashmere. Maybe not the most remote Christian artists, but certainly not a “safe for the whole family” radio station!

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  52. There used to be a website called “Right Behind” which did that. Not only spoofs, but fics taking the same starting premise and doing the job Right.

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  53. Sure, the “OPM” strategy. But even if we ignore risk, the money being invested would have to be liquid enough to make monthly payments, which rates are currently around 0.2%. I get the theory, but I doubt it has real world application! 🙂

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  55. Wow. Just. Wow! Love it! Of course, we all know that ALL Country musicians (along with ALL Classical composers) are ALL saved and everything they produce is holy.

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  57. Ha! Love it! That is what I thought of Christian Ghetto Stuff too. And your last 4 words (“that people actually liked”) sentenced-bombed that idea! Kind of like a photo-bomb in words.

    I don’t get it either.

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  58. Yeah, Cermak, that’s a needed balancing point here. It’s all good eventually. We’re all coming at this from different backgrounds, different perspectives, different, if you will pardon the expression, karmas. different levels of spiritual evolution. Too much we are like sixth graders looking down on first graders learning their ABC’s and 2 plus 2’s. If it aint broke, don’t fix it. Possibly a Downriver Detroit point of view.

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  65. +1,000,000,000. “Magnificent” is the most worshipful “secular” song ever written. And if you can, watch the video. Jaw-droppingly beautiful. (Son is off the album “No Line on the Horizon.”)

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  66. The Hispanic congregation at our church uses them, and I think it’s kinda cool. As I watch them, it seems a form of worship. I guess it’s all in presentation, eh?

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  70. maybe there is a collective fundamentalist desire to punish women ‘for wanting a break now and then’ that is the root impetus for the War On Women . . . or is that ‘War’ just another economic effort to keep wages low for 51 percent of the working force ? . . . (sigh)

    I look at the Duggars, and see sweet Michelle looking so exhausted and worn, and then there is her husband what’s-his-name who looks like all HIS needs are met . . . and I feel like what is going on there is not as ‘wholesome’ as it appears . . . I am not a fan of the Mr. Duggars of this world, no

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  72. As a vocational church musician, I would of course suggest that perhaps you threw out the baby there with the bathwater. But who can blame you? I daily fight an uphill battle against commercialism in sacred music, the cultural drive to pander to the lowest common denominator of pop culture, and religious consumerism that insists on preferences being met, rationalized with spiritual terminology. Some days it literally makes me sick to my stomach.

    I just don’t think no music is the answer, nor a cappella singing. I say, teach your people to sing the Gospel, and teach them to sing it as a united family, not an age or niche interest segregated one, and you can find it to be a powerful force for good in your congregation. God’s Word on their lips will stick in their heads and sink into their hearts over time.

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  73. + 1

    a good friend was raised Quaker and went to Earlham College . . . a kinder person I have never met

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  74. Right, Robert. I understand a little about the nature of Quaker worship. I believe they are the one true non-liturgical worship style. I was just saying that the absence of organ banging or yodeling out not be considered a necessity to hear from God when he is perfectly capable of speaking through such annoyances too. Balaam’s donkey kind of thing (which is usually more of a metaphor for preaching than sacred music).

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  75. I was in a pet store today and heard Ashley Cleveland’s Lucky playing. Could there be a Christian radio station that doesn’t suck?

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  77. We are far from perfect, and I think we have let way too much liberalism creep in, but where we are good w are very good.

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  79. Notice I said if you can make more on your money by investing. Let’s say you wind up with an effective rate of 3% interest per year, but you can earn 8% on the market or in futures or whatever. You wind up 5% ahead.

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  82. I sang Alabaster box to my sister just 2 days before she died on her birthday this year on May 28. She turned 53 the last time her and I will be the same age. I sang in my deep voice and straight from my heart. Her arm went up in the air. I didn’t realize then our time was that short. I could see her driving down the road singing her heart out to God as she liked to do on her commute to work of an hour one way. What is missing in our worship. Well for me it has always been the strong beauty of male voices with the strength coupled inside humility to the privilege and honor it is to sing to our King. You want the young men to stand up and come. Make a way for them to see what God is calling them to be.
    Women when you all stand up and be the daughters of God you change the atmosphere we walk in. You become what He intended you to be. I walk a little straighter, a little stronger, the way I carry myself changes and you help me to be the son of God he called me to be. I hope its the same for you all.
    This is why I stand and sing beside you and I will when we are there. Our voices will be one

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  83. Actually, I think the selection of Sympathy of the Devil at the Rolling Stones Mass was ever bit as outrageous as Personal Jesus.

    Part of my outrage, no doubt, is due to the cognitive dissonance of seeing much of the music of my faux rebellious youth used to sell religion, as it has already been used to sell cars and other products. This is something that the current generations of youth need not fear will befall the music of their rebellious youth as they get older, because their music has been used to sell product from the moment of its inception, and they’re used to it.

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  84. Robert is correct, and yes, worship is the correct term. We’d call it waiting worship.

    Over the years I’ve known (and been guilty myself) way too many people who base what church they attend on whether or not they like the music – as opposed to trivial things like sound doctrine. I have just gotten to the place where I think it’s better to not have it.

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  86. Rock music is really Negro music. It’s full of African rhythms that inflame young people’s lusts. (Think Elvis gyrating.) Also, the Beatles claimed to be greater than Jesus Christ. Many rock stars worship Satan and/or bite the heads off of bats. If you play their records backwards, you can hear Satanic messages.

    (There are occasional exceptions, like “Born in the USA,” which is solidly patriotic.)

    Country music, on the other hand, is the godly creation of hillbillies, cowboys, and other God-fearing types (who borrowed from Irish folk songs and such). If likker and wimmin are celebrated, this should really be considered an expression of local patriotism, and thus a virtue. (“We don’t smoke marihuana in Muskogee,” nosiree, and we ain’t no homos neither.) “So barmaid, fetch a pitcher…”

    Sure, there has been some blending of musical styles lately, but that’s probably because we need to unite against the common enemy of rap.

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  88. But that math doesn’t work. Not paying interest will always be less expensive than writing off taxes, or the banks would be giving money away.

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  89. Read the whole article by Pruitt. I can appreciate some of his points, especially because I play guitar in a (basically) evangelical worship band. There’s some truth to the criticism – the emotional “manipulation”, repetitive lyrics, etc. Honestly, I can’t stand it.

    But calling it “pagan” is way too far. Talk about fostering division. His critiques that it ruins assurance of salvation (what?), musicians are given priestly status, increases division, etc are WAY overstated. You get the feeling that there is more to he story and that he has deeper theological issues with traditions that aren’t his.

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  94. My own Episcopal parish, a parish which I otherwise appreciate and value greatly, has a Saturday evening Holy Eucharist service that features the music of various secular musical artists each week in place of Christian music of any kind. This week it could be the music of Billy Joel (called a Billy Joel Mass), next that of the Rolling Stones (a Rolling Stones Mass…Oh the irony! – Music of my rebellious youth, what have you become, and what has been done unto you?), etc., etc.

    Now, my wife and I loathe this, even though we have little choice because her commitments at the ELCA church require her to be there every Sunday morning. But this secular pop music service has drawn more new members to the church than you can imagine, and who can argue for long with success, especially when there are so many other things that are right about the parish? We, my wife and I, keep our silence, grit our teeth and bear it.

    Note: The most outrageous selection I’ve ever heard at one of these services was at the Johnny Cash Mass, which I actually had been kind of hesitantly looking forward to, when a song that Johnny Cash had covered, though it was first written and performed by another group, was played: Depeche Mode’s “Personal Jesus.”

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  96. I’m not fighting in this war anymore.

    Even the mainlines are capitualting. The most recent edition of the PCUSA hymnal/worship book retreated from the changes in the last, which proudly announced in its introduction that it was the first Presbyterian hymnal to be organized by the liturgical church year, and start with Advent. Why?

    I asked a retired PCUSA pastor who has been interiming at a Presbyterian church my wife occasionally plays memorial services for (she’s a church organist/choir director for an ELCA parish) exactly that question, and he showed me the expanded introduction to his minister’s edition of the book. It stated that the Church must adapt to the changing situation and expectations in this country and others, where freer forms of worship, including spirited contemporary Christian music, are common and the norm, and have even become the only traditions that many people recognize and identify as church worship. This is a very significant retreat from the liturgical ressourcement that the PCUSA and other mainline churches had adopted in the 1960’s, and it occurred in the short lapse between two editions of a denominational hymnal, less than thirty years.

    It’s not just the PCUSA. My wife has shown me the changes in each of the ELCA hymnal/worship books from one edition to another, and although the current ELCA book, Evangelical Lutheran Worship, makes modest changes in the same direction as the PCUSA, the supplemental resource for ministers, Sundays and Seasons, embraces the same approach as the Presbyterian hymnal in a big way. Minister and musicians are advised to use online CCM resources, use alternative instrumentation including guitar-driven bands, and feel free to use music from selections for any liturgical season in any other liturgical season (goodbye, Advent music, or what little is played even in Advent anymore; many in the “traditional” Lutheran parish my wife works for dislike Advent music, and would be happy to see it go away [neither I nor my wife are of the same opinion as they]).

    I don’t like any of this, I’m old school, but I’ve weighed the likelihood of success in turning back the tide, and my instincts and observations tell me it’s a losing battle.

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  97. I think Michael spencer would have been in at least partial agreement with that analysis of Men and Christian radio. I know it resonates with me.

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  98. I think Tibetan Buddhists have a good idea, and that we Christians (or at least we Episcopalians) should get our own prayer wheels.

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  99. That’s because you spelled it wrong. 😉 Censers show up at least 17 times in the KJV, for instance.

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  100. Some BRMC favorites. I found their debut album in high school and they’ve been a constant for me. Yet every time i try to go see them live, either school or church or work committments get in the way.

    BRMC – Beat the Devil’s Tattoo

    BRMC – Weight of the World

    BRMC – Whatever Happened to my Rock n Roll

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  101. Ask him if he’s comfortable worshiping in the houses of Bethel, IHOP, or Hillsong. We sing their songs, but positionally 99% of people would call them heretics.

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  103. Worst work department lunch I ever was at was at a Pizza Ranch owned by some evangelicals who insisted on altar call praise and worship music stations. They all knew I was a believer but at that moment I wanted to apostasize and go on a spree through the owner’s offices.

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  106. I fell in love with the sweet sensation
    I gave my heart to a simple chord
    I gave my soul to a new religion
    Whatever happened to you?
    Whatever happened to our rock’n’roll?

    LOVE Black Rebel Motorcycle Club!

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  108. I’m afraid of tambourines! They are scarry. And that senser thing that priests swing around. I could never find that in the Bible

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  110. And for those of you who, uh, enjoy dentist office visits, here is a song you might like played while your dentistry is performed:

    Do That to Me One More Time (The Captain and Tennille)

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  112. Depending on how fundamentalist her audience was, the author may be giving some wives an antidote to the severely patriarchal attitude that women are for cooking, cleaning, taking care of the kids, and keeping their husbands happy, and should not concern themselves with much else—think Debi and Michael Pearl. If that’s your mindset and you’re exhausted and discouraged, that it’s OK to let someone else cook and clean once in a while may be what you need to hear. This author would be giving such women an authority–a female one, true, but she’s on a very conservative radio show–to point to if she gets flak for wanting a break now and then.

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  114. “Left Behind.”

    Isn’t that the sequel to Cage’s earlier film, “Leaving Las Vegas”?

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  115. Here’s the top entry for a list of songs that SHOULD BE PLAYED IN THE DENTISTS OFFICE:

    I Wanna be Sedated (The Ramones)

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  117. If you’re squeamish, like me, you don’t actually have to read them. Fred Clark, over at Slacktivist, has been deconstructing them for the last 11 years now. For those who want to start at the beginning, he just started a Friday post that is a repeat from the first book; I think this Friday’s will be #3. If you’re a believer in the Rapture, though, or you really enjoyed the _Left Behind_ series, Fred’s isn’t a blog you would appreciate.

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  120. i was waiting in the exam room for my doctor once while the overhead sound system blared “Rock & roll Hoochie Coo”–seemed a bit, well, wrong.

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  122. The warning about Left Behind was completely unnecessary: I’d rather eat scrapple than watch that movie, and I loathe scrapple.

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  125. One can simply ask for “manual underwriting”, where a live human examines your creditworthiness. Not all banks know how to do this, but it was standard in the days before Experion and Transunion and FICO scores.

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  126. During a minor office-procedure to remove a large cyst, my husband’s surgeon was blasting out…

    “Sunday, Bloody Sunday”

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  127. @HUG….

    The issue of “aliens” doesn’t actually generate much interest in most Catholics, simply because we have enough problems dealing with our issues here on earth, and the quest for heaven, BUT…

    CS Lewis best articulated the general view amongst Catholics, even though as we all know, he never made the leap from Canterbury to Rome.

    As he hypothesized, if God has chosen to create other life in His image, they can be in only one of three states. First, they may have never chosen to disobey God, and hence would be in a state of Grace without needing a Savior. Second, they could have chosen to disobey God and not yet had a Savior return to them, in a form they could recognize, leaving them separated from God. Third, they could have sinned and already been redeemed by a Savior, and be in a better state of grace than us.

    Okay, this is based on memory, so if someone has a better telling of this, please share it. And again, this is Lewis, not me….I am simply not that bright or blessed!

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  129. The more I think about it, the more clear it becomes to me that Quakers, of all people, cannot be legitimately accused of neglecting either to listen to or help their neighbors, nor of neglecting to seek God’s voice and face in them.

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  130. “Regarding Roman Catholics, extraterrestrial lifeforms are more taboo, as creatures not descended from Adam and Eve would be subjected to ‘original sin’.”

    I don’t know about the rest of the survey, but if this is an example of its accuracy, it’s terrible. Or maybe it’s only the usual newspaper digest of anything to do with religious matters, which is uniformly terrible. What does that sentence even mean “extaterrestrial lifeforms are more taboo”? Are they trying to say that we can’t even think of the possibility of non-human life because the Bible never mentions it, or something?

    There’s a big difference between accepting that it is not impossible that life might exist in the rest of the universe, and believing that (for instance) a spaceship really crashed in Roswell.

    Did nobody think to ask the Vatican Observatory for their opinion on aliens?

    Or the Pope?

    “That was unthinkable. If – for example – tomorrow an expedition of Martians came, and some of them came to us, here… Martians, right? Green, with that long nose and big ears, just like children paint them… And one says, ‘But I want to be baptized!’ What would happen?”

    Peter understands his error when a vision enlightens him to a fundamental truth: that which has been purified by God cannot be called “profane” by anyone. And in narrating these facts to the crowd that criticized him, the Apostle calms them all with this statement: “If then God gave them the same gift He gave to us when we came to believe in the Lord Jesus Christ, who was I to be able to hinder God?”

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  131. Maybe we should come up with a list: Inappropriate songs to play in a dentist’s office. I’ll start:

    1. Hurts Like Heaven (Coldplay)
    2. Hit Me with Your Best Shot (Pat Benatar)
    3. King of Pain (Police)
    4. You’ve Really Got a Hold on Me (Smokey Robinson)
    5. Twist and Shout (The Beatles)

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  132. I was just thinking about being a kid on family trips listening to Franky Yankovic that my dad played on the eight-track. Not exactly “safe” music, but it was awesome memories.

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  133. The occasional Priest-Scientist-Astronomer who guests on Coast To Coast AM would be surprised at this.

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  135. “The radio station is saying that its music and talk are safe for the whole family – as they should be. ”

    And every discomfort equals persecution.

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  136. And for those of us who are more introverted, those big, loud, emotional worship services are pretty much a nightmare.

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  137. It shows the problem with relying on computer algorithms to take care of life. Computers don’t always do nuance very well.

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  138. Over the years, I’ve heard a number of Christian parents allow their children listen to country music but not Rock & roll. I always found this odd because when I listen to country music, I hear about a lot of gettin’ drunk, raising h*ll, attraction to a sexy girl in tight jeans, etc. So this is better because the songs sometimes mention God & Apple pie & patriotism?
    Always confused me.

    My dentist plays Christian radio in his office. Yeah, it really is that wierd to have someone scraping the plaque off your teeth while you listen to some wispy songstress croon about wanting to be in the arms of Jesus all night long.

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  142. I never feel comfortable in a church that encourages giving vent to our emotions.It is my psychological makeup I guess (I have an anxiety disorder.). Years ago I visited a large Pentecostal church in Seattle, with my roommate who was Assemblies of God. We went several times and never saw anything untoward, the”speaking” seemed calm and spiritual, but I felt very anxious. I have had other worship incidences also that I definitely did not like, some songs too. I will say that singing, dancing, parading around seems like fun, just not for me, unfortunately

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  146. I refuse to enter into the religious wars surrounding the place of music in the Church anymore. I currently work closely with a Pentecostal Christian with whom I’ve had this discussion/argument numerous times, and I always come out of it feeling like a fusty old antiquarian insisting on the trappings of Christianity rather than the core; I end up sounding and feeling less catholic and accepting, too boot. Add to this the fact that he’s a much more conscientious and good-humored Christian than I’ve ever been, and all I can say is: I give up.

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  147. All orchestrated by the high-power, aggressive, cussing, narcissistic Chief Marketing Officer of Religious Products.
    Now, how could you possibly be led to believe that the church is following pagan practices?

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  149. If (and it’s a big “If”) the subject of extraterrestrials appears to be more “taboo” among Roman Catholic, perhaps it’s because Roman Catholics tend to be less credulous (that’s right, I, the often bitter ex-Roman Catholic, said less credulous) than other Christians, the other religious groups listed, and atheists, and so spend less time discussing a subject that holds little interest or seriousness for them. In my experience, despite the occasional apparition of Mary hysteria that appears in the media, most Roman Catholics, both lay and clergy, are pretty down to earth and practical people, and don’t like to waste their time on this kind of stuff. They tend to just laugh at it.

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  152. Thanks for contributing your perspective, MelissatheRagamuffin. I’m glad to hear what someone has to say from a Quaker perspective, wheter liberal, evangelical or anything in between. If there are other Quakers out there in the iMonk readership, please let your voices be heard.

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  153. I forgot this is the former chair of the Fed. Instead of saying “He can’t pay cash?” I should have written “He can’t just print the money?”

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  154. If I’m not mistaken, Miguel, your neighbor is allowed to speak in a Quaker meeting, at the appropriate time and if they feel moved to, just as you are, in each and every service and as part of the worship (Is worship the right word? I just want to make it clear that these utterances are not merely announcements or gab during coffee hour, but integral to the way Quakers encounter God in assembly, which involves listening for the voice of both God and neighbor, in words and silence.).

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  156. I think that kind of worship fills a real need though. I know people (old friends from school back home mainly) who attend these types of services and they live hard lives. The work 2 jobs to support their families, or they have to ship their children off every week to stay with the other parent or they’ve got horrendous health problems or whatever. And the look forward to this type of worship to “recharge” them. They actually need that emotional high, even if it is a product of manipulation. And I’ve got to say, at least having it in this context, in which it’s a public gathering, means there’s a lot less tendency to abuse (by say a guru at a one on one encounter). And others I know with similar problems react by using alcohol or less licit products. It’s not the way I would want to worship (the somewhat ascetic style at my shul suits me to a T), but I don’t think I really have the right to critique the way other folks choose to worship who are suffering much worse hardship than I am.

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  157. I’ve seen flag waving (actually, more like baton-twirling, only with skinny cloth streamers attached to the baton) at Congregational churches. Go figure.

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  158. So aliens for Catholics are a matter of occasional speculation among theologians, but not dogmatic pronouncements. The subject is understandably not much preached about from the pulpit. If intelligent alien life is eventually discovered, I expect that the Church would wait to see what they are like before taking any firm position.

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  159. It actually doesn’t make sense to pay cash for your home in a lot of circumstances. Since you can write that interest off of your taxes, you wind up paying a lot less of the cost of borrowing than the contract indicates and if you can make more on your money (say by investing) then you come out ahead.

    Now, in my case, if I were rolling in dough, I would pay cash, but that’s more due to living on the ragged edge from time to time in my life. People who are born and stay rich probably don’t have my hangups.

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  160. Somewhere in the archives of “Stuff Fundies Like,” there is a video of a church service where the pastor grabs the flag (can’t remember what flag) from behind him and while waving it, marches up and down the aisle.

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  161. Which means only one thing: We need a spoof of Left Behind in the same way Airplane spoofed Airport/Zero Hour.

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  162. Ja, but no one I know actually LIKES muzak. I thought the point of Christian ghetto stuff was to create copies of stuff in the secular culture that people actually liked.

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  163. Re Todd Pruitt on music: He’s on to something. The endless repetition, almost mantra-like, of a couple of words– words devoid of context and narrative arc. The subtle (or not so subtle) manipulation of the crowd’s emotions by the chief performer, the so-called worship leader. The ecstatic (or more often, the wannabe-ecstatic) facial expressions of the worshipers. (Especially the females. At the risk of being ruled uncouth, let me share with you an observation one lady made to me about another lady she saw at one of these praise & worship gatherings: “I had a tough time figuring out if she was worshiping or working out with ben-wa balls.”) This is what’s become the de facto focal point of services at many so-called evangelical assemblies. It all makes me wonder if they’ve crossed a line they shouldn’t have crossed.

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  165. Uh, that doesn’t fit ANY Catholics I’ve run across. “We ARE Alone” is much more characteristic of Evangelical Born-Agains whose It’s-all-gonna-burn Universe is Earth-and-some-lights-in-the-sky.

    Romish Popery maintains The Vatican Observatory and HAS gotten into the news for speculations on ET life.

    There is even a document on First Contact protocols dating back to the Ninth Century, when ETs were Monstrous Races from far lands in Medieval travellers’ tales. Ratramnus’ “Letter on the Cynocephali”, taking on whether the Dog-Headed Men of the Far East were “human” in the eyes of God and how to recognize if they were.
    http://bedejournal.blogspot.com/2009/08/ratramnus-and-dog-heads.html

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  166. For Mr. Beaver had warned them, “He’ll be coming and going” he had said. “One day you’ll see him and another you won’t. He doesn’t like being tied down – and of course he has other countries to attend to. It’s quite all right. He’ll often drop in. Only you mustn’t press him. He’s wild, you know. Not like a tame lion.”

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  169. FIRST. WORLD. PROBLEMS.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j-qrmSFNt74

    Thing is, when you’ve personally beaten the Survival Game and have only First World Problems left, that survival instinct still kicks in strong and you react to your First World Problems full-strength as if they were Life-or-Death threats. This explains a lot of Activism.

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  170. Re Ben Bernanke being turned down for a mortgage: The real head scratcher here is why does “a guy who makes $250,000 per speech and has signed a book contract reported to be in the seven-figure range, who owns a house worth over $800,000” need a mortgage to begin with? He can’t pay cash?

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  171. In some New Thought churches, “meditations” are “led” by the pastor in the style of a hypnotic suggestion, while the keyboardist plays mood music.

    “Symp” and “Parasymp” subliminal mind-control music rhythms as used by the Hierarchy in Fritz Leiber’s Gather, Darkness!

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  173. “Flag waving is known to drive off evil spirits.”

    O…Kay…

    Anyone know what Magickal tradition that comes from? Tibetan?

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  174. “David Murrow at the Church for Men blog says Christian radio poisons boy’s faith”

    David Murrow at Church for Men has now officially gone Round the Bend.

    Guy started out making a lot of sense, but this is starting to sound like a Sixties Guns & Ammo editorial or Seventies Soldier of Fortune magazine. Real Man Ruggedness sub-type; how long before we see “William Wallace II” rants?

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  175. In some New Thought churches, “meditations” are “led” by the pastor in the style of a hypnotic suggestion, while the keyboardist plays mood music.

    There do exist Quaker hymns, even for the non-programmatic contingent. I prefer silence but approve of non-instrumental psalmody and qawwal.

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  176. Yeah, if the mental scarring of your youth centered around singing a song that references Barbecuing Hamsters and bouncers in tutus, I think you’ve had a safe life.

    (Not that it’s worship music or anything. Singing silly pop songs and calling it “worship” is another topic)

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  178. As an evangelical with some Quaker affinities (I’m reading “A Testament of Devotion” right now, do you know it?), I find that worship aids me in centering down. I’m not much of a singer, but I find that the environment of people singing out to God is very conducive to finding that connection with him. Where else can we find that during the week?So my posture is usually arms up, head down, quietly listening. I’m often in tears by the end of the set, having hardly uttered a word out loud.

    And if I find the songs annoying, I take it as a challenge to find that place of stillness even when life is distracting. It’s good practice, all snark aside.

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  179. “What do you think? Has worship music become the evangelical sacrament?”

    I vote that it should be. If we could officially “sacramentalize” our worship, I think it would go a long way in helping us take much more seriously and leave some of the goofiness behind.

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  181. “Regarding Roman Catholics, extraterrestrial lifeforms are more taboo, as creatures not descended from Adam and Eve would be subjected to ‘original sin’.”

    I wonder what encyclical THAT came from.

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  182. One guillotine scene, that’s all I ask. Call it an Easter egg, if that’s not too theologically confusing.

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  183. The whole problem with Christian radio always using the phrase “Safe for the whole family,” is that, as a public representation of Christianity, the implication is that Jesus is safe. He isn’t, therefore this is false advertising, and people who buy this sales pitch end up returning the product when they discover it was a lie.

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  184. I am afraid of people waving flags. I always go around. Perhaps some spirits feel the same way.

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  186. “only promised that the God of angel armies is at your side”

    How is that kinda not the same thing? Unless while being at my side he happens to have dispatched all his armies to deal with the Serpent’s assault on the un-fallen Jovian moon Europa? You’d think he’d at least keep a few arch-angelic body guards around him. It would really be kind of jerky to be standing right at my side and let me get hit by a car.

    “The angel armies … they are not for you. ”

    That stinks. Much less fun.

    “2. During a vacation to Washington, DC, Adam acquired an angel army.”

    If I do get an army DC will be one of my first destinations.

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  188. Steve, Evangelicalism does not consider baptism and the Lord’s supper to be sacraments. But they do look to music to provide what more traditional forms of Christianity claim to receive from the sacraments.

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  189. “That means they are Socialists.”

    That made my day.

    Hey, did anyone else catch the Wisconsin politician who wants to abolish all days off? That’s right: if you are not working on Sunday in order to honor “The Lord’s Day”, you are also a dirty, lazy, pinko-commie collectivist out to destroy Merika.

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  190. “Regarding Roman Catholics, extraterrestrial lifeforms are more taboo, as creatures not descended from Adam and Eve would be subjected to ‘original sin’.” Is this a typo? If they are not descended from A&E then why would they have original sin? Lewis’ “Out of the Silent Planet” fired my imagination regarding extraterrestrial life. It was such a vivid description of life on a planet where no fall had occurred. It made me long to go there.
    “When Bobby becomes a teenager, he begins to crave adventure. Danger. Risk… At the same time, Bobby begins to lose his faith. He feels embarrassed to say he is a Christian. It just feels wimpy and unexciting to believe in Jesus…” And then Bobby grows up.
    Ben Bernanke. Why if you make all that money, do you need a mortgage?
    “Todd Pruitt thinks many churches are actually promoting pagan experience rather than genuine Christian worship”. I just had me a Dave Hunt flashback. Question for the group; is it legitimate / permitted for Christians to experience altered states of consciousness? Monk’s chanting, contemplative prayer, prolonged fasting… Or is that necessarily always pagan?
    Left Behind. Why do we do this to ourselves?

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  191. I’d say that the Sinners Prayer and Worship Music have replaced baptism and the Lord’s Supper as sacraments for many evangelicals, respectively. And by that I mean that most evangelicals (as far as I can tell from being in evangelical settings since the early ’90s) believe baptism and communion are ‘mere’ symbols, albeit important ones, but the Sinner’s Prayer and contemporary Worship experience are truly effective. I think if a choice had to be made between keeping the once-a-month Lord’s Supper or the rockin’ Worship music experience, the music would have to stay, at least that’s my impression, because it’s considered more conducive to allowing the Holy Spirit to move while the wine (grape juice) and the bread are just tradition.

    Disclaimer: I currently attend a service with more hymns and less contemporary worship music, so the music experience does not come into play so heavily, but I have attended other churches where this is the case.

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  192. “And yes, I would object to an organ concert promising, in and of itself, to be a conduit for “energy and love.” There has to be a better way to explain the power of music.”:

    I would go with hoots of derision. And that is just in the context of a secular recital, where I would assume that the organist was going to go in for bombast, mistaking volume for energy. If it were a church marketing itself this way, I would take it that they were trying too hard to market themselves to the younger set, and were probably dipping their toes into Evangelical worship style, but hadn’t yet gone in all the way. This might mean trying to do praise choruses with an organ, which seems a dreadful idea. Or it might be mere hype, but i would worry that on any given Sunday the organist might disappear (not due to the Rapture) and be replaced by a praise band.

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  193. Let’s see, the seven sacraments of the church:
    1. The obligatory 30-60 minute praise show.
    2. The 30-60 minute sermon/lecture.
    3. The altar call.
    4. Announcements.
    5. Small Groups.
    6. The Super-Bowel Party with the game on the same jumbotron used for “worship”.
    7. Cultural War.

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  194. I for one hate the phrase, “Safe for the whole family”. It is a separatist, fundy sort of statement. “Boring and pedestrian”: yeah, that describes Christian Radio (TM) quite well. Nothing says “Safe for the whole family” quite like “Get My Praise On”.

    My kids grew up listening to the Ramones on family vacations.

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  195. Yesterday I was asked about flag waving while dancing at a tent revival in town. I hadn’t seen it so I referred the guy to our church secretary. She is a regular. She told the guy that the flag wavings “are known to ward off evil spirits.” WHAT. Flags = talismans

    FYI We are Episcopalians. So it was really strange.

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  196. Amen x 10 on The Christian radio bit. My workplace has a radio on throughout the day, not Christian, but they do play the “Focus on the Family” hour with interviews. Several weeks ago, the interview was with some woman who had written a book on something or other. The interview mainly centered on how difficult it is to be the mother of small children-agree, it is. But this woman went on and on about how you should feel free to hire a housekeeper now & then so you don’t feel so bad about your messy house, and how it’s ok to order take- out now and then. God, after all, does not want us to feel bad.
    All I could think was how shallow this must seem to any non-believer, heck, even to a believer. What about the mother who has no fresh water or food to give her children. Should she call for carry- out, too? Children are dying all over the world for lack of nutrition. Sanitation, and being caught up in war, but we, as Christians, should be concerned because our houses are messy?
    As you can tell, this one really bothered me. It’s why I rarely listen to Christian radio, and why I believe David Morrow might be on to something, although I don’t think this involves only guys.

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  197. RE: BB’s $800,000 home – assuming that home is in the DC area, that may not be as impressive as it sounds. Inside the Beltway, $800K will just get you a decent-sized house in a decent neighborhood – not a mansion. If anything, that would demonstrate Bernanke’s frugality for a man of his stature. The farther out you go, though, the more that $800K would get you.

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  198. As a Sovreign Grace Independent Landmark Fundamental Premillennial Baptist, I found these scenarios confusing. First of all, according to our denomination there were so few genuinely saved people in the world that even if the rapture happened as described, there wouldn’t be enough Christians taken out for anyone to notice. Certainly no worldwide panic like this and other popular rapture flicks portray.

    How could we be a sacred remnant and still have millions of people raptured out? Made no sense to me.

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  199. Is there a link to the original article regarding CCM? I would be interested I reading the whole thing.

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  200. It’s been a while since I heard the song, but I think Tomlin only promised that the God of angel armies is at your side.

    The angel armies … they are not for you.

    But if I do heard north on 95 next week, and find wreckage all up an down the highway, at least now I know there are two possibilities:

    1. The rapture has occurred.

    2. During a vacation to Washington, DC, Adam acquired an angel army.

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  201. i’m not Quaker, but I often find the music annoying & distracting, too, mostly because so much of it is so bad. Even many of the old hymns are pretty bad when you get right down to it. We used to sing one in the Lutheran church when I was a kid about converting the pagans in places like India & Ceylon and we can’t forget the tried & true “onward Christian Soldiers” which, of course, does not discuss violence while we are ” marching off to war…”

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  203. Music and the songs I enter into I sing to Him Like He was standing right in front of me or walking beside me when I walk the mountain and pray. When my first grandson died in my hands I howled so loud I am sure it went straight to heaven. I had to leave the hospital and go to the mountain to cry and pray. On the way back down He said sing over him and I broke out into a song singing you are so beautiful to me. Chorus after chorus and I began to heal inside. Tears still fill my eyes when I think of it but heart is not so heavy. I want to sing to Him like he is standing in the room and I usually change the words from He to You. Not everybody is like me but song has healed me of a lot. I heard a 6 or 7 year old belting out a song a couple of years back and I heard see and I saw. Up till then I just mouthed words to act like I was singing because I thought I couldn’t when others were around But I found out different thanks to a little boy and love. Kind of like he was sharing his lunch with me.

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  204. “Just as there are prohibitions against people getting driver/pilot licenses who are subject to seizures, there should also be a prohibition against people who believe they may disappear into thin air at any moment. ”

    PERSECUTION!

    And yet, it is some kind of victory if secular society actually believes your claims and acts on them.

    Dilemmas, dilemmas.

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  205. “Has worship music become the evangelical sacrament?” Not only “a” sacrament, but “the” sacrament in some cases… Yes it (CCM/radio/celebrity worship leaders) has, at least in my neck of the wilderness… This may be extreme, but I think the people I know who rely on it heavily, would feel lost spiritually if they didn’t have it to lean on…

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  207. According to the Catholics and maybe the Orthodox there are seven sacraments.

    The one and only time the word sacrament appears in my yearly meeting’s book of discipline it is in reference to marriage.

    Re music in worship: I’ve been a part of the Quaker community for so long that when I do attend a worship service that includes music that it’s actually a hinderance to being able to enter into worship rather than an aid. I find it distracting and annoying. How can I center down and listen for that still small voice when someone is yodeling in my year or banging away at a pipe organ?

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  208. “Had to sing”? Was this someone FORCING you to sing “Shine” at gunpoint or, even worse, some attempt to use that song in corporate “worship”? (I actually think it’s a mostly harmless snack of a song, though I know it turns some people’s stomach, kinda like most of Newsboys’ catalog. It’s the Funyuns of music.)

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  209. K-Love = baptized Muzak. 😉 Well, worship music simply CANNOT be an evangelical sacrament, because there are only two sacraments; baptism and the Lord’s Supper. 😉

    Just as there are prohibitions against people getting driver/pilot licenses who are subject to seizures, there should also be a prohibition against people who believe they may disappear into thin air at any moment. Flying a plane while knowing you may disappear, causing all on board to die is as far from Christian love as is possible.

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  210. “knock on my door asking a question like: “Do you believe in extraterrestrial life?””

    Does this happen? To somebody? It never happens to me. Which is disappointing. That would be a really fun discussion.

    The only people who come to my door either represent the candidate who will carry my district’s vote anyway or who want to sell me some kind of natural gas contract to same me tons of money. Yes, I vote for that guy, as does everyone else here except the lady across the street. And replacing some old windows is a better investment. These conversations are boring.

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  211. “And yet … it is still on the radio station.”

    I know, I heard it just last week.

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  212. “what I hear is somewhat at odds with the way faith operates for me or the shape of experience”

    You mean you don’t go through life with angelic armies standing by your side? [Chris Tomlin]

    That would be so awesome! If I was surrounded by angelic armies then I wouldn’t have to dodge all those people who text-and-drive; they’d just be smited on the spot! BAM! Yeah, that is what walking-in-faith means.

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  213. “I reconsidered my pagan ancestors more kindly every time I had to sing that song about people “on the outside looking bored”.

    This song made sense to me for about 30 minutes of my time as a teenager. Then I remembered that the cool clique at school had all been really mean.

    Then I grew up, and it made even less sense.

    And yet … it is still on the radio station. I am now 35. WHY WHY WHY.

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  214. “surveyed 24 different religions on what their beliefs are regarding aliens in outer space”
    I may in the future use this as an example of correlation-without-causation.

    I hate polls where I can’t see the actual questions and ones that call me up or knock on my door asking a question like: “Do you believe in extraterrestrial life?”

    I’ll say yes to “Do I think there MIGHT be other life in the solar system or in other star systems or galaxies?” But as to believing in little green men or even an Adam or Eve on another planet, I can’t answer that with a yes or no. Because it’s not a binary question except for fans that believe the X-Files is a docudrama.

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  215. “Todd Pruitt thinks many churches are actually promoting pagan experience rather than genuine Christian worship.”

    To some extent I agree, but this rhetoric makes me twitch. Dropping juicy words like “pagan” adds a strange spice the stew. It also maligns anything not explicitly Christian (“religion” vs. “Christianity”, etc) and casts Christianity and “everything else” as exact opposite forces. Too much binary. Mostly unnecessary. Can be summoned to the service of almost any argument, good or bad.

    However, the claims the quotes make about contemporary Christian music make me twitch far more.

    “Join us for dynamic teaching to set you on the right path, and inspiring worship where you can meet God and receive the energy and love you need to be a mover and shaker in today’s world…Alongside our teaching program are worship events which put you in touch with the power and love of God.”

    Good thing someone made a consumer product with such amazing powers, available for a limited time in select venues. What would we do without big record labels? [And yes, I would object to an organ concert promising, in and of itself, to be a conduit for “energy and love.” There has to be a better way to explain the power of music.]

    It’s besides the point from Pruitt’s argument, but the quip I would add is that these expectations, if they are anything more than marketing hype, make CCM into one of main means for relating to God. And it seems whenever I switch on the CCM stations to see what they are playing, they depict emotions that are almost always very forceful, and it is generally only certain kinds of emotions that get much expression. I may be an anomoly in this (I’m kind of a quiet, melancholic person), and maybe my sampling is not representative, but what I hear is somewhat at odds with the way faith operates for me or the shape of experience. I feel railroaded. So my immediate question is how these are functioning as scripts for experience. If you use the psalms as a counterpoint, those don’t necessarily reflect how I am feeling either, but they transverse a much larger realm of experience, some if it rather raw and surprising.

    In fairness, though, I disengaged from CCM a long time ago; if I were using it “to connect to God” every week and on some weekdays, it would probably be shaping my experiences and the disjuncture might be less stark to me.

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  216. Apparently all airplane pilots and railroad engineers are also Good Christians.

    Wait… aren’t most railroad engineers and airline pilots members of a union? That means they are Socialists. I was certain we all go straight to Hell? This doesn’t make sense.

    I think I’ll skip that movie, it looks confusing.

    But Nicholas Cage…

    I’m torn.

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  217. “surveyed 24 different religions on what their beliefs are regarding aliens in outer space”

    I may in the future use this as an example of correlation-without-causation.

    “are most susceptible to believing in extraterrestrials”

    Most ***susceptible***? That is an odd word choice. And what does “believing” in extraterrestrials mean? For most people I suspect this translates to: ‘their gut feeling regarding how likely it is they exist’. It seems a thing categorically different than belief in God, the variability of the speed of light, or if the Chicago Cubs will ever win a game ever.

    “David Murrow at the Church for Men blog says Christian radio poisons boy’s faith”

    I have no doubt that this contains a kernel of truth. Listening to a radio program where group of middle to upper-middle class women natter about the travails of marriage and raising children, and having to just-give-their-struggles-over-to-god blah blah woof woof…. Of course a younger person, male or female, sitting in the back seat has to suppress their gag reflex; that their parents listen to that twaddle makes them, and what they believe, seem absurd.

    These shows where people discuss their families, and the arguments, behaviors, etc… on the radio – often in noteworthy detail are extremely disrespectful of their children as people. How would you feel about your mother, discussing with the nation when you stopped wetting the bed? Posting every moment of your child’s life [who is a Person, BTW] on Facebook is disgustingly disrepectful enough – but broadcast radio? Really? Get a clue.

    “music becomes a means of mediation between God and man. But this idea is closer to ecstatic pagan practices than to Christian worship”

    Todd Pruitt has extensive experience with “ecstatic pagan practices”? Or does “significant theological error” just equal “paganism”, and since it is “ecstatic”…. ? He should have worked the term “idolatrous” in their somewhere, just to completely cover the buzzword spectrum. You cannot have a truly Good Christian Rant without labeling something [which could more effectively be described directly] as “Idolatry”; I’m certain that is the lost 11th commandment. I’m disappointed, Mr. Pruit.

    Personally I’d choose Ecstatic Pagan Music over Praise-n-Worship-Chorus every time. I reconsidered my pagan ancestors more kindly every time I had to sing that song about people “on the outside looking bored”.

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  219. So I guess newborns and small children DO go to heaven. If it’s in the movie it must be true. 🙂

    Maybe the movie would have done better if the lead was played by Simon Helberg?
    (You’d have to have been a fan of Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip. But I think there were only a few dozen of us.)

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