Allen Krell: “No simple theological vocabulary has answers to the complexities of my own situation”

krellNote from CM: Today we feature two updates by good friends of Internet Monk. We begin with Allen Krell, whose blog carries this descriptive subtitle: “I am on a spiritual journey, looking through Christian history as I search for the common church.” Many of us identify wholly with his sense that the Church is broader than any one tradition and that, even when we become part of one expression of the Church, we can still appreciate and learn from others.

* * *

My journey is similar to many members of the Internet Monk community. I had spent much of my life in the evangelical circus when I entered the post-evangelical wilderness, and I started on a journey that would change my life forever. Through this blog and others like it, I started searching. At first, I didn’t even know what I was looking for, but my wanderings continued. I explored Plymouth Brethren, Anglicism, Presbyterian, Lutheran, Pentecostal, Methodist, Roman Catholic, Eastern Orthodox, house church, and a host of other traditions. I searched through church history, questioning and examining everything I had ever believed.

However, I had an immediate problem. Like so many readers of Internet Monk, I wanted a path on how to get out of the wilderness. I felt a strong sense that I needed to settle in one tradition, even if that tradition didn’t necessarily have all the answers. The path for choosing a tradition was simple. I knew my family wasn’t ready for Roman Catholic or Eastern Orthodox traditions, and I knew I couldn’t handle strong Calvinistic churches. One day I was at a friend’s downtown business, and I noticed the Lutheran church across the street. We started attending the new member’s class with the stipulation that we were not ready to join. After two years of attending regularly, my family made the decision to become members.

For us, the decision to join was not made lightly. We weren’t just joining the church, we were joining the Lutheran tradition. I made a commitment that if at all possible, I would spend my entire life in this tradition, ending one day with my funeral in this tradition. I wanted to commit that my wanderings would be over. I would continue reading and studying church history, but for the remainder of my life my physical wanderings would be complete.

My local congregation has been very supportive. I have been entrusted to lead an adult Sunday School class which is now actively studying the Holy Spirit’s work in the early church as given to us in the book of Acts. Although developing close relationships has been difficult, my wife and I have finally been able to develop some strong relationships and have become connected with this community of believers. I have found myself agreeing with the teachings of the Lutheran tradition. Most of all, I love the vocabulary, especially phrases such as the “Two Kingdoms” and “Law and Gospel.” I passionately believe that salvation is a free gift, provided to us on the cross without consideration of our own effort.

But, my journey continues. Although I believe the vocabulary of this tradition is useful, I have found it inadequate in my own life. My life situation is very complicated, and no simple theological vocabulary has answers to the complexities of my own situation. In the darkness of my life struggles, I yearn for so much more. I found myself seeking the traditions of the eastern branch of Christianity. In my own devotions, I seek Theosis, the process of being transformed into the likeness of God. I seek aligning my energies with the uncreated energies of the Triune God. The phrase “God was made man so that man could become God” has provided me a path that seems to have some degree of answers for my own life. Now, each week, I feel as though I live a double life. Each Sunday I strive to use the vocabulary of the Reformed and Lutheran traditions, but in my own life and in my own devotion I study and seek transformation as taught in the eastern traditions. In a sense, I feel like the person who marries one person while simultaneously in love with another. At times, I feel as though the two traditions are incompatible, and I will ever be tore between the two. Yet, at other times, I see a mysterious compatibility of the Lutheran and Reformed emphasis on “Grace alone” with the transformation process of the eastern traditions.

As I read from others in the post-evangelical wilderness, I realize I am not alone. I see Protestants who join the Roman Catholic church, yet do not fully adopt the Church’s teachings. Teachings such as purgatory or the immaculate conception may be a bit too much too accept. I see Protestants turned Eastern Orthodox who avoid the full practices and traditions of the church. I have seen blogs written both by Roman Catholic and Orthodox priests who bemoan us wanderers who do not fully accept and participate in the church’s teachings.

I invite comments from others who have joined a tradition but do not fully participate in that tradition. Do you struggle as you do not fully accept the tradition’s teachings? How has your new found tradition accepted your struggles?

The Homily

feedTrust in the Lord with all your heart,
and do not lean on your own understanding (Proverbs 3:5, ESV).

When they had finished breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon, son of John, do you love me more than these?” He said to him, “Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.” He said to him, “Feed my lambs.” He said to him a second time, “Simon, son of John, do you love me?”He said to him, “Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.” He said to him, “Tend my sheep.” He said to him the third time, “Simon, son of John, do you love me?” Peter was grieved because he said to him the third time, “Do you love me?” and he said to him, “Lord, you know everything; you know that I love you.” Jesus said to him, “Feed my sheep.” (John 21:15-17, ESV)

I have said this many times, but I want to say it once again. I am very blessed to be associated with some of the best writers I have ever worked with right here at iMonk. Chaplain Mike, Damaris Zehner, Adam Palmer, Lisa Dye, Mike Bell and Martha of Ireland tirelessly give of their time and talents to make our site one of the most read blogs on the internet. What makes them such great writers is their willingness to be vulnerable, to share their insights and experiences with you. This is not easy for anyone to do. You, the reader, are then free to rip into what they say. It is hard for anyone to have their words challenged when they are shared in a sincere way. Yet every time I ask them to write, they give of themselves freely again—for your sake.

It would be a lot easier if we all just wrote niceties and easy-to-swallow words. I call it pablum. Then we wouldn’t be subjecting ourselves to second-guesses, to those who want to show off their intellect by picking at some small error we’ve made. But pablum does not nourish. Cotton candy does not fill. And God, I believe, is not pleased with pablum or cotton candy. So we continue to share from our hearts in open, vulnerable ways.

To be vulnerable means to let down the walls around our hearts and give of ourselves freely to others. It is an uncertainty; it involves risk; it exposes us emotionally and spiritually. Vulnerability reveals our fear of rejection. We know that when we are vulnerable, people will see us as we are. It makes us naked, as it were. And outside of the garden, we no longer live naked without shame.

Yet it seems to me that God expects us to be vulnerable, even knowing how much it scares us. When we act in ways that can be explained and understood, we feel safe. When we take risks, we must trust the Lord. Most of the time, trusting him does not make sense. If it did, would we really need to trust him? Faith involves risks which means being vulnerable.

Jesus asked Peter to feed his sheep. I have a feeling Peter did not have a clue what Jesus meant by that at first. He learned soon enough, however, that in order for Jesus’ sheep to be fed, he would have to become food himself. He would have to accept that Jesus forgave him for his denial. That God really did intend for Gentiles to enter into the Kingdom of Heaven. For Peter to fulfill Jesus’ command to feed his sheep, Peter could not remain in the safety of the Law. He had to enter the gates of grace by becoming vulnerable, enduring the attacks of those who could not fathom God inviting Gentiles where they had been previously forbidden.

We can choose safety in our lives, or we can choose vulnerability. Our own understanding leads us to places of safety, or at least what we think is safety. To be vulnerable is not safe. Having faith is not safe. Remember, however, that the only way we can please the Lord is by faith. That means our life must be one of constantly being vulnerable, not seeking to understand but to become food for others. Vulnerability takes courage. It takes a bit of an “I don’t care” attitude. Faith and vulnerability are joined together.

Does this sound too difficult? No one ever said following Jesus was going to be without risks. But it really is the only life worth living.

Let us pray.

Saturday Ramblings 11.16.13

RamblerHappy Saturday, iMonks. A couple of weeks ago in my Sunday homily, I mentioned how I was looking for a certain type of apple called the “black twig.” It was the best apple I had ever had, but that was years ago. Well, I have a new favorite. I stopped at the store on the way home from church last week and found an apple called SweeTango. Oh. My. Goodness. My new favorite. Trouble is, it is an early-season apple, and I got the last bag the store had. I’m not sure if they will get any more in until next fall. I have one left which I’m going to eat for my lunch today. Last night, I used four large Granny Smith apples to bake a pie. Yes, I know the apple gets a bad rap from the scene in the Garden and all, but I love ’em. Now that we have that out of the way, shall we ramble?

Sarah Palin sure stays busy. She has moved from Alaskan governor to vice presidential candidate to media babe to … theologian? Palin weighed in earlier this week on Pope Francis, saying he was a little too liberal for her tastes. Then she backpedaled, saying the liberal media gave her some wrong information. She talked about how the media needs to get its facts straight. So, if you are keeping score at home, does that make Palin the pot or the kettle?

According to the liberal-est of all media, the New York Times, there are Catholics in the U.S. who are unhappy with the direction this pope is taking the Church. Seems everyone wants support for their favorite cause.

And an Italian prosector says that Francis may be in very real danger from the Mafia. Seems the pope is meddlin’ when he should just stick to preachin’. Of course, with many organized crime members who live in Italy being practicing Catholics, that makes it a bit more complicated. Hit men go to Mass before they kill someone? Help me out here. Isn’t that kind of frowned upon?

Continue reading “Saturday Ramblings 11.16.13”

A Perspective on Canadian Healthcare

canada-healthIt seems like everyone from everywhere has been chiming in on healthcare issues, so I thought I would add a Canadian perspective.  I have read a number of comments about Canadian care which have not been overly accurate, so I thought I would help set the record straight as much as I am able.  I will not be drawing comparisons, because frankly I do not know other systems well enough to do so.  You may draw your own conclusions with your own comparisons, but I will leave that up to you to do in the comments.

Anecdotal evidence

Let me start with some Canadian scenarios which we have experienced in our family in the last number of years.

1.  Wife has baby.  Complications resulting in week long stay in hospital for both mother and child.  No bill.

2. Son breaks foot on the school playground requiring emergency visit and x-ray.   No charge for the visit but had to pay $50.00 for crutches.

3. I get attacked by a virus that attacks my pancreas which stops producing insulin.  Diagnosis is Type 1 diabetes.  Visits to the diabetes clinic are covered by government healthcare.  Insulin, test strips, and needles are not.  Cost approximately $1000 a month.  In my case I am currently covered by my employer’s healthcare plan, but when I was unemployed I was not.  There are some programs you can apply to which cover a small portion of it.  Generally medicine is not covered at all for those under the age of 65.

4. Dental care.  Not covered by general health insurance.  I have coverage through my employer’s group plan.

5. Father got cancer.  Many tests.  Surgery.  Spent a week in hospital.  No bill.

6. Father in law got cancer.  Many tests. Brain surgery.  Spent three months in hospital where he died.  No bill.

In other words:  Visits to the Doctor result in no extra charges.  Medicine and Dental are not covered by the general government insurance.  I do see a lot of bad teeth in the poorer areas of town.

Choice

I can choose my Doctor or Surgeon.  Theoretically everyone receives the same level of service in Canada.  Under Canadian law I cannot pay extra to get quicker or better service.  (Hockey players and pets somehow seem to be exempt from this.)

Competency

I have rarely questioned the competency of the Doctors who have treated me or my family.  They have been very professional, thorough, and well trained.

Wait times

Generally, wait times for service in Canada can be lengthy.  My experience has been that the more critical the procedure the shorter the wait time.  In both parents case, surgery for cancer came soon after diagnosis.  On the other hand, a neighbor who needed knee replacement surgery waited for a year and a half!  The current wait time in the province for knee replacement surgery is 220 days which means that 90% of patients get the surgery done with 220 days of diagnosis.

Taxes

Tax rates in Canada are similar to those in the U.S.  The general health care we get is funded through taxes and premiums charged to employers (Ontario).  For those whose health care expenditures are greater than 3% of their income, the amount over 3% is tax deductible.

Sustainability

This has to be the elephant in the room.  Will we be able to afford our universal care in the future?  The graph below shows how costs are growing rapidly in Canada.  With the Baby Boomer bulge hitting retirement these per-capita costs are going to continue to grow significantly.  I think it is going to lead to some very uncomfortable questions about end of life issues.

 

HealthcareTrend

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So, speak up Canadians.  Am I missing some important points here?  What can you add to this discussion? Our American and overseas friends:  How does this compare to the service that you receive?  Which system would you prefer?

Vision Forum Ministries to Close

douglas-phillips-vision-forum-i10

In an announcement on their website, Vision Forum Ministries, the nonprofit ministry headed by Doug Phillips, has announced that it has closed. Phillips recently admitted being unfaithful in his marriage and resigned his position of leadership at VF. Here’s the statement:

In light of the serious sins which have resulted in Doug Phillips’s resignation from Vision Forum Ministries, the Board of Directors has determined that it is in the best interests of all involved to discontinue operations. We have stopped receiving donations, and are working through the logistical matters associated with the closing of the ministry. While we believe as strongly as ever in the message of the ministry to the Christian family, we are grieved to find it necessary to make this decision. We believe this to be the best option for the healing of all involved and the only course of action under the circumstances.

In a clarification on his resignation, Phillips said:

The local church, not the Internet, is the proper forum for overseeing the details of a man’s repentance, but I just want to be clear for the sake of peace within the Body of Christ, that the tragic events we are experiencing, including the closing of Vision Forum Ministries are my fault, and that I am sincere that I should not be in leadership, but must spend this season of my life quietly walking a path of proven repentance. Please pray for the Phillips family, the Board, and the men who have made up the staff of Vision Forum Ministries.

Phillips will not resign from the for profit arm of VF — Vision Forum Inc. About this, he said:

Last week, I announced my resignation from the presidency of Vision Forum Ministries, a 501(c)3 organization. I retain ownership of Vision Forum, Inc., a distinct and private company, but consistent with my desires to lead a quiet life focusing on my family and serving as a foot soldier, I will not be giving speeches or running conferences at this time of my life under the banner of VFI or VFM. In addition, Doug’s Blog will become the Vision Forum Blog and will be focused on publishing reports and articles by others, along with news and information from Vision Forum, Inc.

Vision Forum Inc. describes its mission in these terms: “The mission of Vision Forum is to communicate a vision of victory to Christian families through edifying books, films, toys, curriculum, and other resources.” VF is one of the more well-known proponents of the patriarchy and “Quiverfull” movements. They have had a big impact on certain sectors of the Christian home school world.

While I have vigorously disagreed with the theology and approaches of this movement, it seems that those involved with VF are taking appropriate steps in this matter. I, for one, don’t care to know any details, and I simply want to express that it is never a matter of rejoicing when a person becomes captive to sins that affect not only himself but his family and others. When one has a wider circle of influence, it is even more devastating.

May grace and peace rule in this situation.

Are We More Gracious than God?

prodigal return
Return of the Prodigal Son, Tissot

 Above all, maintain constant love for one another, for love covers a multitude of sins.

– 1 Peter 4:8, NRSV

Love…keeps no record of being wronged.

– 1 Corinthians 13:5, NLT

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This is not meant as a formal theological analysis of the meaning of the atonement. It’s more like street-level questioning of the way people often talk about sin and grace and God, especially when we place too much or exclusive emphasis on the common evangelical metaphor of penal, substitutionary atonement.

Are we more gracious than God?

The following is what I often hear about God and his stance toward our sins. Some of these are direct quotes from sermons or theological writings or evangelistic articles. The sentiments are so common that I will not cite sources or name names. Just Google “sin must be punished,” and you’ll get lots and lots of statements like these.

gavelThere is a price tag on sin, and therefore sin must be paid for. God cannot allow sin to go unpunished.

Justice requires that sin be punished, because sin deserves punishment. The justice of God obliges him to punish sin.

God, in his holiness, is infinitely opposed to sin. He cannot overlook it but must act with righteous judgment, exacting vengeance against it.

Since God has given us his Law and commanded us to live by it, he must punish those who break his law. Not to do so would be unjust.

In Scripture, sin is spoken of not merely as a terrible evil; but, much more than this, as legal guilt, which the righteous Judge must punish; as something so abhorrent to his holy nature that he cannot allow himself to be approached by any one on whom that guilt still rests; that he cannot meet with anyone from whom that guilt has not been removed by sacrifice.

In order to avoid defying a part of His character, God must judge sin. God cannot ignore sin no matter how loving and kind He is for to do so would deny one of His attributes, i.e., His righteousness.

God is love, but He is also just and righteous. If so, he must punish wickedness in the same way that a judge in a court must punish for crimes.

God is love, but genuine love cannot mean leaving sin unpunished either. Rather, because he loves us, God took the punishment for our sins on himself in Jesus.

If God could just overlook sin, there would be no need for Christ to have taken our punishment on the cross.

Sin must be punished.  God provided a punishment for our sins – Jesus bore our punishment.  We can choose to accept the punishment that Jesus made on our behalf, or take the punishment ourselves.  Either way, sin must be punished.

I have heard and taught this for decades, and still agree with Scot McKnight, who wrote, “I don’t know how to read elements of (especially) Paul without explaining his soteriology as penal…” (A Community Called Atonement). The Bible’s portrait of God as a righteous judge who punishes evil as part of putting his fallen creation to rights is an undeniable part of the biblical witness.

But, as McKnight also reminds us, “Atonement language includes several evocative metaphors…Each is designed to carry us, like the pole, to the thing. But the metaphor is not the thing.” We need all the metaphors (such as sacrifice, reconciliation, redemption, and ransom) and, even then, must humbly confess that we understand only the the outlines of who God is, how he loves us, and what he has done for us in Jesus Christ.

As I was driving today, the verse heading this post came to my mind. It immediately struck me as yet another clue to the unfathomable love and grace of God toward you and me:

“…love covers a multitude of sins.”

Continue reading “Are We More Gracious than God?”

Mike Bird: N.T. Wright and Michael Kruger on Healthcare

Health care reform5

Note from CM: Thanks to Michael Bird for sharing this article with us. Bird, an Australian Bible scholar, is Lecturer in Theology at Ridley Melbourne College of Mission and Ministry. His new, well-regarded book is Evangelical Theology: A Biblical and Systematic Introduction, and Scot McKnight has begun blogging about it at Jesus Creed. Mike blogs at Euangelion.

I suggest that you not only read the post below, but also Mike’s longer piece on the subject from 2012, entitled “Evangelicals and Health Care”. Both of these pieces provide a view from “across the pond” on our health care debate in the U.S. It never hurts to get a different perspective, even if you end up disagreeing.

For a contrary point of view, look at the post written to counter NT Wright that is referenced below, Michael Kruger’s article, “Obamacare, N.T. Wright, and the “Via Media”.

I’m looking forward to a spirited, civil discussion today.

* * *

Michael Kruger, New Testament scholar and President of RTS-Charlotte (see his forthcoming book on The Question of Canon), takes exception to N.T. Wright’s critique of evangelical opposition to the Affordable Care Act or “Obamacare.” This is what Wright said in an interview:

In your country, for example, there seem to be Christian political voices saying that you shouldn’t have a national healthcare system. To us, in Britain, this is virtually unthinkable. Every other developed country from Norway to New Zealand has healthcare for all of its citizens. We don’t understand all of this opposition to it over here in the U.S. And, we should remember: In the ancient world, there wasn’t any healthcare system. It was the Christians, very early on, who introduced the idea that we should care for people beyond the circle of our own kin. Christians taught that we should care for the poor and disadvantaged. Christians eventually organized hospitals. To hear people standing up in your political debate and saying—“If you are followers of Jesus, you must reject universal healthcare coverage!”—and that’s unthinkable to us. Those of us who are Christians in other parts of the world are saying: We can’t understand this political language. It’s not our value in our countries. It’s not even in keeping with traditional Christian teaching on caring for others. We can’t understand what we are hearing from some of your politicians on this point. Yet, over here, some Christians are saying that it’s part of the list of boxes we all should check off to keep in line.

Kruger, who I’ve met briefly and had the pleasure of corresponding with a few times, takes aim at Wright for these words and you can read his response here.

Continue reading “Mike Bird: N.T. Wright and Michael Kruger on Healthcare”

Shameful, Ridiculous, and Cruel

On Monday, Veterans Day, we ran a post that, it is hoped, caused us to think more perceptively, compassionately, and realistically about matters related to war and military service and have a thoughtful conversation.

Today, another conversation came to my attention on the same topic that could not be more shameful and ridiculous. Furthermore, it models a preposterous approach to Scripture that all sane believers should denounce as completely illegitimate.

Finally, it is pure cruelty toward those who suffer from the effects of war.

The steam came out of my ears when I saw this.

 

Looking For A Bigger God

bowI have been exploring  in recent posts some of the reasons I am leaving evangelicalism after 40 years. As I have stated, these are my reasons alone. Each time I post, some will comment to the affect that I am trying take others with me on my journey. I have never said that or inferred that. My experiences are just that—mine. Many of you are very happy in your evangelical churches, and that’s great. I encourage you to stay right where you are. I am describing why I am leaving, not telling you what you should be doing.

I made some upset on Sunday when I said that God does not have our best interests in mind. That he has his best interests in mind. Now, making people upset does not really have much of an effect on me. I don’t try to do that, but I can’t control other’s responses to what I say. Yet this is a good jumping-off place for explaining another reason I am leaving evangelicalism. In the evangelical circles I was raised in, and then was a vital member of, for 40 years, I heard over and over that God cares for my every need, is concerned with the smallest detail of my life, wants to meet all of my physical, emotional and financial needs.

And that is very true. He does. He knows the number of hairs on my head. He cares for me more than the birds of the air, which he cares for. He clothes me greater than the lilies of the field. There is no detail in my life too small for his notice or care. And his love for me knows literally no bounds. Yet for so many evangelicals, God’s concern for us becomes the all-consuming reason the universe exists to begin with. And that is just not the case.

I mentioned Job in my Sunday Homily. To many evangelicals, Job is an example to us of persevering through hardship. Of how good people will win in the end. Of how things may be dark now, but God will give us back all we have lost and more if we simply stick with it. This is the God of evangelicalism: He is most interested in my well-being. Job is not a character study of a man who perseveres. It is a play, where God and Satan meet, and God decides to put his own interests on display. In this play, Job loses all he has, but does not curse God, because God is worthy of our praise no matter what. This is what God wants to put on stage: his glory.

We can even say all of creation from the Garden to the Incarnation was Act One of a great play called God’s Glory. Act Two was the life of Jesus to the Cross. And Act Three was the Resurrection. It is a great play put on for the angels and all the universe to show that God is worthy of all honor and praise, that even though we continually break his covenant, he will go to the greatest length possible to show his glory, even to the point of becoming one of us. The author stepped into the play, as Lewis said. The author is also the plot of the play, which gets more complicated. But let’s just stick with the author being the primary focal point of this play we call Life. Yet we have gotten confused and believe we are the focal point. That God is most interested in our needs and wants rather than in his glory.

I want a bigger God than one who is focused on me and my needs. I did not find that God in evangelicalism. The God I found there is a Jeff Dunn-centered God, one who is there to meet all my needs like a great snack machine. I want a God who is much bigger.

In the Catholic Mass, the focus is not not me. Once the Mass begins, I am not the main player. I am part of the audience calling Author! Author! I come to the table Jesus has laid, and enjoy the bread and wine he himself provides. And this happens every day, all over the world. It is not about me, it is about God and his glory.

I did not find this in evangelical churches. I am finding it in the Mass. Again, this is my journey. You don’t have to come with me. But I think you will find the view from the Mass to be spectacular.