Guest Post: A Mere Lump of Humanity?

Today’s Post is by Adam McHugh

Note from Chaplain Mike:
Back in March, we reviewed Adam McHugh’s fine book, Introverts in the Church. Adam is not only a writer, but also a hospice chaplain. I wrote him and asked if he would contribute a hospice story because I thought it might be helpful for our readers to hear another voice talk about this personal and pastoral work.

Adam’s story takes the “philosophy” of my posts from earlier this week and puts a “face” on it. To me, it is especially poignant, for I met another “Jimmy” today on one of my visits.

Enjoy.

“When you put on a luncheon or a banquet,” [Jesus] said, “don’t invite your friends, brothers, relatives, and rich neighbors. For they will invite you back, and that will be your only reward. Instead, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, and the blind. Then at the resurrection of the righteous, God will reward you for inviting those who could not repay you.” (Luke 14:12-14 (NLT)

A MERE LUMP OF HUMANITY?
by Adam McHugh

I sat at my desk on a Monday morning and perused the telecare reports from the weekend:

  • The patient needs a refill on meds.
  • I need to talk to a social worker.
  • When will they remove the equipment?
  • I colored three pictures today.

Without looking, I knew that the last call belonged to Jimmy.

Continue reading “Guest Post: A Mere Lump of Humanity?”

Another Look: Pastoral Care of the Dying, Part Two

Abraham Mourning for the Death of Sarah, Chagall

By Chaplain Mike

Here is the second part of Michael Spencer’s November 17, 2009 interview with me about “Evangelicals and Pastoral Care of the Dying.” (If you are coming to this discussion late, see the introduction to yesterday’s post.)

INTERVIEW, PART TWO

4. At what point is it appropriate for a minister to talk about death when a family may be refusing to speak about it?

The subject usually comes up naturally if folks have access to the kind of support I just talked about—a calm, reasonable, caring human friend to sit with them, who is available to listen and support them. Occasionally, a compassionate minister or friend may need to help someone face reality and speak the truth plainly when it is being denied. But most of the time, it is clear that people know what’s going on, and they just need time until they can talk about it.

We have all kinds of people who come into hospice care, and they come from a variety of faith and non-faith backgrounds. Some are on-board and realistic from the beginning. Others say “Don’t mention death or use the word hospice. Hide your badge so mom won’t know you are from hospice.” Some refuse to sign “Do Not Resuscitate” orders because they can’t imagine not trying to bring dad back if possible. They put off making funeral arrangements or getting necessary documents together. Some don’t want the chaplain to visit. A friend of mine said he once had a patient who called the chaplain, “the sky-pilot,” the person you only see when you’re ready to be launched into the afterlife! Other folks struggle when grandma doesn’t want to eat anymore, and so they keep trying to force food into her. Many people refuse to give or take pain medications, especially morphine, because they view that as crossing the line and forsaking life.

So, in hospice we have to be gentle with people and respect their journey. We pretty much don’t force anything but emphasize giving good information and the kind of supportive presence that will give people permission to talk about things they’d rather not face. I’d recommend ministers and friends do the same. Again, it’s not efficient. It takes time. But it is loving, and the “small miracles” we see every day of people being helped and supported through some of the toughest experiences of their lives are worth as much as seeing Lazarus come forth.

Continue reading “Another Look: Pastoral Care of the Dying, Part Two”

Another Look: Pastoral Care of the Dying

The Raising of Lazarus (after Rembrandt), Van Gogh

By Chaplain Mike

Back on November 17, 2009, I wrote my first post for Internet Monk. Actually, it was an interview that Michael Spencer did with me called,“Chaplain Mike Mercer: Evangelicals And The Pastoral Care of the Dying: The IM Interview.”

Lately, as I have solicited questions for the “Ask Chaplain Mike” posts, several readers have inquired about matters related to my work as a hospice chaplain. I will answer them this week, but I also thought it would be good, especially for newer readers, to read the initial interview as a foundation. Originally, it was presented as one complete post. I will break it down into two parts this time so the discussion can be more focused.

My work is one area of my life right now where I have a positive sense of the presence and activity of God. Being able to continue ministering in a pastoral fashion to my neighbors has kept me spiritually hydrated as I’ve wandered the post-evangelical wilderness with regard to the church and as I’ve struggled with other issues related to mid-life.

But this is not really about me. It is about the God who is at work behind closed doors, where family members sacrifice greatly to care for dying loved ones. It is about the privilege of being able to go to them and show kindness and concern. It is about knowing that God has gone ahead of me in each encounter, that I am entering a story that has been being written for many years, and I may have a part to play. It is about working on a team of talented, compassionate people, who use their gifts and work together to bring peace to patients and their families.

It is the most Jesus-shaped thing I have ever done.

Continue reading “Another Look: Pastoral Care of the Dying”

For Memorial Day 2011

By Chaplain Mike

I offer this, my favorite music video of all time, on America’s Memorial Day, for all who have died because of war, with a prayer that the day will come quickly when all such fighting and dying shall cease.

Now the sun’s gone to hell
And the moon’s riding high
Let me bid you farewell
Every man has to die
But it’s written in the starlight
And every line on your palm
We’re fools to make war
On our brothers in arms

iMonk Classic: Conversations with Michael Spencer

Let me be the first to say that I am enjoying the discussions we’ve been having lately on Internet Monk. I plan to incorporate more discussion sessions in the near future through “Ask Chaplain Mike” and “Let’s Discuss…” posts. Readers have sent in thoughtful questions via email and in the comments I’ve received several ideas for these times of interaction.

I hope it has been encouraging to you as well. If you haven’t yet joined the conversations, jump on in, the water’s fine!

My wife reminded me of a day when Michael “opened up the phone lines” for an entire day of discussion. On Saturday, August 1, 2009, Michael sat at his computer and entertained questions all day long. By the end of that Saturday, he had answered 130 queries from readers about a variety of subjects.

You can read the original post here: “Saturday Is for Asking Questions.” I encourage you to do so. It will give you a good snapshot of what it was like to have a conversation with our late friend, Michael Spencer. Here are a few bits from the discussion:

QUESTION: Lately, you’ve mentioned Luther’s impact on your understanding of how we are called to live out our sanctification. Could you help clarify how Luther sees living with our sinfulness and our sanctification as different from the Calvin or the Wesley camps?

iMonk: Well, the guy who said “sin boldly” isn’t Wesley, that’s for sure. Wesley believed in the possibility of perfect love. Luther would never use the word “perfect” about anything in Christian anthropology or experience. Calvin’s view of sanctification is about visible evidence that you are elect. “Make your election sure,” i.e. drive yourself to despair, imo. Luther says sinful people are given a perfect salvation by faith as a gift. Sanctification is totally rooted in the Gospel. I think Luther is weak on discipleship. My views on discipleship are in a 4-page article in the upcoming Modern Reformation magazine. Wesley’s type of discipleship processes, with Luther’s theology in the Gospel. That’s a good balance.

Continue reading “iMonk Classic: Conversations with Michael Spencer”

The Insatiable Beast Takes Another Bite

By Chaplain Mike

That wonderful old Christian satire magazine The Wittenberg Door used to have a regular feature called, “Truth Is Stranger than Fiction.” That would be an apt way to describe this story I came across today.

I couldn’t have made this up in a thousand years. And I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. No, come to think of it, hand me a Kleenex.

Here are the facts:

  • A group in Colorado Springs (let us all pause and bow toward our new Mecca) wants to develop and produce a movie in a new genre that is apparently ripe for picking: a “Christian Sex Comedy.”
  • Rich Praytor, co-producer and writer, is doing so because he admires the films of Judd Apatow so much. Apatow has graced us with such fine, thoughtful, edifying films such as “The 40 Year Old Virgin,” and “Knocked Up”—“secular” sex comedies.
  • Now he wants to (and I quote), “take something like that into the Christian arena.”
  • His movie, “The Waiting Game,” tells the story of a man who remains a virgin until his wedding day then struggles with abstinence after his bride-to-be dumps him at the altar.
  • The big laugh of the movie apparently comes when the disheartened guy states his intention to give up on staying pure, telling a friend in a restaurant, “I’m so frustrated. You know what? I’m just going to do what I want to do anyways. It’s not like it’s going to wind up on the front page of the newspaper,” So, guess who overhears their conversation and says, “Hey Buddy, I wouldn’t do that if I were you.”? Drum roll, please. Ted Haggard. Ha! I’ll bet Ted’s former parishioners will be rolling in the aisles laughing.
  • The tagline for the movie? “Abstinence never felt SO good.”
  • A comment by the movie’s promoters on the site’s Facebook page says, “We are still raising the money for this movie, but we are aiming for release in 2012–right in the middle of political season! We hope for it to add to the debate on family values and encourage the faithful to stay true to the word. So please keep praying for us.”

(Sigh.) Really?

Of all the ways Christians might “engage the culture” (oh, how I hate that phrase!), this is the best we can do?

Millions of dollars are going to be spent on this. Has anyone done a Kingdom cost-benefit analysis?

Could any example be clearer that today’s believers are “of” the world, but not “in” the world?

Is there no one out there willing to stand up and say “no” to ideas like this?

Are we all prepared to take another punch in gut from the world for our immaturity, tackiness, and the tin ear we have toward the words of our own Bible: “Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.”?

I’ll shut up now. By giving this movie a few moments of attention, I’ve done my part for the Evangelical-Political-Industrial complex today.

Pop culture is an insatiable beast, and it is swallowing American evangelicalism, one large bite at a time. I need to go listen to some Bach or something to try and make this bad dream go away.

Saturday Ramblings 5.28.11

Greetings, iMonks. Once again we have reached the week’s end. Every time we have a Friday, Saturday invariably follows. I like Saturdays. They’re great for hiking, yard work, running to the big box home improvement store to buy things for the yard, wondering why after applying weedkiller my grass is not growing but the weeds are having a great time, watching reruns of Frasier DVR’d Friday night, listening to the Reds lose yet again, and, of course, for Rambling. Shall we begin?

My good friend, pastor of the Spanish service at my church, and leader of my life group—Vic Cruz—heads up One To The Other Ministries. He does a lot of disaster response ministry. Vic was in Haiti just weeks after that devastating earthquake. This week he was in Joplin, Missouri—just a little more than an hour from Tulsa. Vic says that the damage in Joplin was worse than he saw in Haiti. He and a few others were there to hand out food and drink to volunteers and victims. To pray for any who wanted prayer. He watched as they pulled bodies from the remains of houses and buildings. The local Lutheran bishop also toured the town struck by an F5 tornado. You can read his accounts here. Pray. Pray for those in Joplin. One third of the town is gone—just gone. It is a sad time for our neighbors.

In case you missed the news, Oprah retired from her daily show this week. I will confess right here and now that I have watched a grand total of ZERO episodes of Oprah. (There hasn’t been a good talk show on TV since The Dick Cavett Show as far as I”m concerned.) Kathryn Lofton, a professor of U.S. religious history at Yale, talks about how Oprah gained messiah status. How has Oprah affected your life?

Rick Warren announced he has lost 36 pounds while following the Daniel Plan diet he is leading his church in. That’s nothing. All those at Saddleback Church in Southern California who are participating in this diet have lost more than 190,000 pounds. I wonder if the lines at In N Out are any shorter now in Orange County? But that’s not what I wanted to talk about. John Piper interviewed Warren concerning Warren’s theology. I haven’t watched this yet, but it should be very interesting to say the least. And yes, this does fulfill our John Piper quota for the week.

Continue reading “Saturday Ramblings 5.28.11”

Ask Chaplain Mike: “A Tenuous Seat in the Mainline”

By Chaplain Mike

Last week, we started a new series called, “Ask Chaplain Mike.” Readers submitted questions via email and I will continue to answer them, devoting a post or two each week to your inquiries. When I start running low on questions, I will let you know, and we will solicit more. I have enough to keep going for a few weeks here.

Today, we deal with a friend who has a question about navigating the post-evangelical wilderness.

Today’s Question

Hi Chaplain Mike,

From reading your posts, I suspect you may be dealing with these issues, too. For those of us who are post-evangelical and have left that world and found a very tenuous seat in the mainline churches, how do we:

1.  Reconcile being there when the organization is moving so far left, especially with the ordination of homosexuals;

2.  Deal with the ever-present guilt that we “should” be in a church that condemns sin and not just drift along with the crowd through the broad gate? (Erasing 30 years of the “us” vs. “them” evangelical mentality.)

Friend,

Thank you for your good and thoughtful question. It is one I continue to struggle with as well. I hope I can say something that will encourage you here.

Continue reading “Ask Chaplain Mike: “A Tenuous Seat in the Mainline””

Graduation Day

This is a fun time of year when we get to celebrate with those graduating from high school or college. I will be traveling to Ohio next week to take part in my niece’s high school graduation. You may be attending graduations or open houses in the next few weeks yourself. It really is a great time to celebrate with your friends and loved ones and the loved ones of your friends.

I taught school—both at the high school and college levels—for fifteen years. I went to all of those graduation ceremonies, plus those of my own children, my nieces and nephews, listening to an endless litany of names being misread, speakers trying to say witty things, and school orchestras bravely playing Pomp and Circumstance. Still, it was a time to congratulate those who were done learning.

Done learning. That is the mindset of those who have come through the Western educational system. We sit in classrooms for twelve years, then four (or five, or six) more to get our college degrees. We sit and listen to teachers share information with us, take notes, study those notes the night before an exam, then regurgitate the information back on tests or in a bluebook essay. If we get a passing grade, we are done with that subject and move on. Then we repeat the process in our next class. On graduation day, we are declaring to all who are there for us that we are done with those subjects. We’re done with our learnin’—it’s time to move on to the next thing.

Unfortunately, this mindset has carried over into our Christian life. We go to church on Sunday, Bible and notebook in hand. We listen to a teacher (also called a preacher) share information with us—whether it be exegetical or topical. We dutifully take notes, especially writing down how we can apply what we have learned. We want to be sure to get the lingo right so we can repeat what we have heard. And, thus, we think we have graduated and are ready to move on to the next thing.

That is our mindset. It was not the mindset of those at the time of Jesus.

Continue reading “Graduation Day”